bats' book blog

3/21/24 1:16pm

new liveblog! we're reading the last final girl by stephen graham jones:

Life in a slasher film is easy. You just have to know when to die.

Aerial View: A suburban town in Texas. Everyone's got an automatic garage door opener. All the kids jump off a perilous cliff into a shallow river as a rite of passage. The sheriff is a local celebrity. You know this town. You're from this town.

Zoom In: Homecoming princess, Lindsay. She's just barely escaped death at the hands of a brutal, sadistic murderer in a Michael Jackson mask. Up on the cliff, she was rescued by a horse and bravely defeated the killer, alone, bra-less. Her story is already a legend. She's this town's heroic final girl, their virgin angel.

Monster Vision: Halloween masks floating down that same river the kids jump into. But just as one slaughter is not enough for Billie Jean, our masked killer, one victory is not enough for Lindsay. Her high school is full of final girls, and she's not the only one who knows the rules of the game.

When Lindsay chooses a host of virgins, misfits, and former final girls to replace the slaughtered members of her original homecoming court, it's not just a fight for survival-it's a fight to become The Last Final Girl.

tag is bats reads tlfg

3/21/24 1:24pm

right off the bat, i kinda don't like the pop culture quotes. a little is fine but i'm worried it might end up leaning too much on referential humor

3/21/24 1:27pm

oh nooo no one warned me this was written like a screenplay. i'm still gonna give it the best shot i can but oof this writing style is Not For Me

3/21/24 1:39pm

even past the screenplay(ish?) gimmick oof. this is kinda bad ngl. it's... very hard to continue. i'd maybe like to make it to act 2 at least but.

man, 10 years does a lot. going from this to having written one of the most hyped slasher horror series ever. may we all someday see that level of creative glow-up

3/21/24 1:44pm

i think the thing that bothers me most is that by trying to write it like a movie it actually ends up being less cinematic and harder to picture in my head than if you'd just written it normally?

3/21/24 2:00pm

sorry y'all. i can't do it. this book is just. it's so 2012. it's so bad. i am choosing to be kind to myself today